Oh for Christ's sake ... "from indulgent Belgian chocolate to savoury, tangy cheese, discover 9 irresistible [fake news: I have done so] hot cross bun varieties ...". Honestly, these people would crucify their savoury, tangy Grandmothers for a few denarii more.
So what, I wonder, might the other 7 lip-smacking, soul-destroying taste experiences be? Leaving out old-school, boring Hot-Cross-Bun flavour - SO twentieth-century! - how about:
3. Chewy, picante Italian pepperoni;
4. Sizzling Mexican fajita;
5. Smoky, dopey Baltic eel;
6. Touchy, feely kiwi-fruit & mushroom;
7. Traditional chicken tikka;
8. Aromatic, stringy Stoke-on-Trent refried Brexit pavement pizza;
9. Sod it.
And how about this, too?
3. Chewy, picante Italian pepperoni;
4. Sizzling Mexican fajita;
5. Smoky, dopey Baltic eel;
6. Touchy, feely kiwi-fruit & mushroom;
7. Traditional chicken tikka;
8. Aromatic, stringy Stoke-on-Trent refried Brexit pavement pizza;
9. Sod it.
And how about this, too?
I'm neither a Christian nor easily offended but this is a particularly nasty and tasteless piece of mindless awfulness from a company which abets our own worship of meaninglessness by selling hot cross buns every day of the year only to run out of them religiously by 8am on Good Friday. All I can say is that we deserve Tesco as much as Tesco doesn't deserve us.
Anyway, Happy bloody Easter. The good, it seems, die both young and in vain.
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